Intro:

Money is a common denominator among most American families. Whether they’re making it, saving or spending it or just plain wondering if they’ll ever have enough of it, family finances are a common source of ongoing stress!

Today families are immersed in a society that rewards excellence, efficiency and self-fulfillment. The ongoing promotion of programs, products and service organizations eagerly strive to accommodate the earnest desire of parents to give their children the best possible upbringing. Creative ad agencies and actual shopping experiences are nurturing a preoccupation with consumerism in children as young as age two. By age ten, the average child makes more than 250 purchase visits to shopping centers each year. This is compounded by the fact that American children, ages 8-12 accumulate $8 billion in gifts and allowances each year, with over $6 billion considered discretionary. It is interesting to note that only negligible portions of a child’s talents, gifts and abilities are directed toward the church, missions or charitable organizations. And, though children today are perceived to have more resources and opportunities available to them than any other generation, they are known to lack the most within as nurture a sense of belonging, identity and self esteem! This reality creates additional points of contention as conscientious parents strive to affirm individual interests and concerns and fulfill the role of provider, good steward and healthy money manager.

Here are a few practical insights and activities to nurture families of all ages and stages to perceive their financial affairs through a lens of grace and faith. After you’ve had a chance to try one or two, share your learnings with another family. Select a book from the resource list to deepen your new insights and discoveries. And remember, even smallest steps count! Putting priorities into perspective, defining wants and needs, and pausing to evaluate and appreciate the “big picture” are all a part of coming to grips with what it truly means to be “blessed to be a blessing."

As for those who in the present age who are rich, command them not to be haughty, or to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but rather on God who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, generous and ready to share.  1 Timothy 6:17-18

Implications for growth and Involvement

1.      Financial decisions informed by values need not mean deprivation and denial, nor will they always guarantee clean credit reports.

2.      Identify something you or your family desires and set aside money as “intentional” savings to actualize your good intent rather than delay your gratification. Take a proactive look at possible or impending needs or investments. Try to avoid an “all or nothing” mentality.

3.      In the midst of striving to live within your means, gift or grace yourselves with “green pasture” moments and events. Refer to Psalm 23 as you ask God to guide your desire to refresh and restore your hearts  Make sure your choices and decisions are purposeful and NOT haphazard.

4.      Teach your children to develop a pattern for intentional money management. Introduce them to the budget formula known as “80-10-10” – 80 percent for spending, 10 percent for giving, and 10 percent for saving. For example: SPEND 80% on special snacks or treats; something needed at home or school; or on something to enjoy with friends; on clothes or food.  GIVE for regular church offerings, special offerings and to others outside church.  SAVE to buy something special; to use when older.

5.      Give your family opportunities to share your wealth of compassion, time, talent and other resources with others. Work together on services projects in your congregation or community. Appoint a “servant of the week “ to attend to miscellaneous household tasks.  Later, affirm the role with a simple and meaningful reward.

6.      To change our lives we need to act our way into thinking, not try to think our way into acting. Changing the way we handle our finances can change our lives. Our new-found behaviors may free us from the bondage to money and allow us to trust in God’s’s abundant provision.

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Recommended resources for you

Blue, Ron. GENEROUS LIVING: FINDING CONTENTMENT THROUGH GIVING. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1997.

Hinze, Donald W. TO GIVE AND GIVE AGAIN: A CHRISTIAN IMPERATIVE FOR GENEROSITY. New York: Pilgrim Press, 1990.

Miller, Herb. MONEY ISN’T/IS EVERYTHING. Nashville: Discipleship Resources, 1994.

Wheeler, Sandra Ely. WEALTH AS PERIL AND OBLIGATION: THE NEW TESTAMENT ON POSSESSIONS. Grand Rapids: Wm B. Eerdmans, 1995.

Resources for Children and Youth

Brumbeau, Jeff. THE QUILT MAKER’S GIFT. New York: Scholastic Press, 2000.

Karon, Jan. MISS FANNIE’S HAT. Minneapolis: Augsburg Fortress, 1999.

MONEY DREAM. Seattle: Evergreen Youth Television, 1999 (8-minute videotape)

Roehlkepartain, Eugene C., Elanah Delyah Naftali, and Laura Musegades. GROWING UP GENEROUS: ENGAGING YOUTH IN GIVING AND SERVING. Bethesda: The Alban Institute.

VEGGIE TALES: MADAME BLUEBERRY, A LESSON IN THANKFULNESS. Chicago: Big Idea Productions, 1998 (30-minute videotape).

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Bible Study

Possible Titles-- Money Matters or Money: A Mixed Blessing?!!

For the Leader:

Make ends meet?! You’ve got to be kidding! We’ve all heard a sermon or two linking financial responsibility with the fine art of faithfulness. But how do faithful people actually deal with the reality of what it means in their daily, ongoing beat of life?

--Especially when there always seems to be something that prompts us to spend more dollars than we have, inevitably sending us into “over time” with easy access and ongoing to extended credit. Acknowledging that most Americans live just one or two pay checks away from “financial overload,” the topic begs us to consider God’s grace and provision in the midst of the ongoing tensions we reside in.

This Bible study is designed to engage family members of all ages in an interactive exploration of how faithful families today might address the financial challenges and opportunities they encounter. In doing so, it highlights the financial challenges of a rich man in Mark 10:17-25.

As we witness his journey, we will observe his encounter with Jesus and his invitation to throw his financial dependence and security to the wind in favor of extreme discipleship. And, without knowing whether he actually did, we will be given the opportunity to associate the dilemma he faced with our own promptings to let faith and grace flow into this aspect of our lives. How do we manage our intent to stay faithful and financially afloat?

Note: This study may be accomplished in one extended family time or divided into brief devotional moments.

Gathering Activity: “Let the Good Times Roll”

Objective:

To help children, youth and adults of all ages appreciate the abundant variety of family resources that reflect the ongoing and sometimes uneven flow of income and expenses.

Preparation and Supplies:

Download the “Let the Good Times Roll” game sheet and the “Snapshots” cards. Gather a scissor, pencils or markers, a different coin for each player to use as a marker,  a pair of dice and a wallet with a few dollars in it.

Cut apart the cards and place them around the game sheet.

Display some of the cash and credit cards in your wallet as you comment on the various financial gifts your family has been given to provide for your home and family. Refer to your workplace and other organizations that are committed to sustaining the lifestyle you have chosen.  Introduce the game “Let the Good Times Roll” as a fun way to discover some of the fruits of your labor and investment.  Use the following directions for play.

Invite players to claim one coin to be their game marker. Take turns rolling one die and moving the number of spaces indicated. Identify the design and refer to the matching card. Answer the questions on the card to help you take a “snapshot” of this resource in your home. You may play the game for as long as you wish.

Comment on the abundant variety of resources that shape your lifestyle. Invite your family to consider the possibility that you may already have everything you could possibly NEED to live a good life. Then, ask a few clarifying questions: What else could we possibly WANT? Is their a difference between what we need and what we want?

Bible Reference: Walkin’ in a Rich Man’s Shoes

Associate your busy lives with the rich man in Mark 10: 17-22. Point out that he was a wealthy man but he still yearned for one more thing. Invite your family to listen as you take turns reading Mark 10:17-22 in a text and format that will engage everyone. Consider using a Children’s Bible or an contemporary version. You might also engage them in acting out the story as someone reads the passage.

Use the following questions as a guide for discussion.

1. How do you think the rich man felt when Jesus asked him you to “let go” of all the things that belonged to him? 2. Point out that the rich man was trying to live a life that was pleasing to God. After all, he had been learning about God’s character and God’s promises and expectations since he was a boy. So why do you think Jesus would ask him to do such a dramatic thing? 3. In an effort to discover Jesus’ answer, consider some of the other things that were probably important to this wealthy man. Do you think he had a family, a job, a home and a life full of activities?  Do you think they would ever become more important to him than Jesus? 4. Do our actions ever make things seem more important to us than Jesus?  How important do you think money is to us?  Do you think we could “go and sell everything we have, and give the money to the poor” so we could put Jesus first in our lives?  Do you think that we might walk away uncertain and sad like the rich man?

Point out that we don’t actually know if the rich man ever did what Jesus asked. But, we can probably assume that he spent the rest of his life striving to figure out how he could  or still should respond. Even the disciples were puzzled and perplexed when Jesus shared this story with them. They knew that affluence, success and personal fulfillment were upheld as virtues in their culture, too. And, they were well aware of the realities they faced when they decided to “let go” of everything they had to follow Jesus.

Jesus uses a clever and intriguing image to describe the challenge and it’s level of difficulty in Mark 10:25, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.”

Associate this seemingly impossible task with challenges you may be invited to  encounter or address your own lives. There are probably very few families who are in a position to “go and sell everything we have, and give the money to the poor” as they look forward to the treasure they will have in heaven. The rest of us can most likely be found muddling through our own versions of the story, the aspirations and contemplations, of the  the rich man as we strive to be faithful in the midst of our current standard of living. And, in doing so, we may be inspired to discover that our task is  more about “letting God ” than “letting go.” The more open we are to acknowledging Christ’s power and presence in our lives, the more accurately we can define the role and gauge the impact of everything else we encounter.

Real and Relevant Applications: Lookin’ Through Camel-size Needles

Objective:

To use the concept of a camel and a needle to create a tool to identify your core values and evaluate the many lifestyle choices you have to make

Preparation and Supplies:

Download the Camel and Needle Design Sheet. Cut-out the designs, including the eye of the needle. Gather scissors and pencils and markers.

Focus on the needle first. Use it as a symbol to identify and affirm your family commitment to honor Jesus in all you say and do. Write the following phrase on the needle:

The (Family name)  are open to “letting go” and “letting God” shape everything we say, think and do.

Then, use the following points as a filter to recognize some of the core values your family upholds as you strive to characterize this commitment. Write them on the needle.

Filter Points:

1. Does the activity inspire or equip us to give honor and praise to God?

2. Does the activity nurture our desire and ability to honor, love and serve others?

Consider including at least one of the following ways your family might acknowledge God’s power and presence in your lives: love, honor and respect each other, forgive one another, read God’s Word, pray together and for one another, spend quality time together, affirm and nurture each other’s God-given talents and gifts, provide for emotional, physical, intellectual and spiritual needs, use financial gifts and other resources you’ve been given in healthy and responsible ways.

Then, display the camel next to the needle and place the snapshot cards you used while you were playing “Let the Good Times Roll”  on the camel.  Take turns drawing a card from the stack and assess each resource or activity using the Filter Points.

Conclude this activity by affirming that it is probably “easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.” But, because “God loved the world so much, he gave his one and only Son so that whoever believes in him may not be lost but have eternal life” (John 3:16) we can celebrate the good news  Jesus shared with the disciple’s in Mark 10:27, “This is something that people cannot do, but God can. God can do all things.”

God’s Story--My Story: No One Said It Was Going to Be Easy!!

Take a moment to consider how you will let faith and grace flow through this aspect of your family life? Our lives and finances are multilayered and filled with uncertainties. Yet the resolution to this tension resides in God’s faithfulness and your commitment to honor God as you manage your financial interests and concerns  in faithful, loving ways. Pray daily for God’s guidance and perspective as you encounter situations and events in your daily lives that you challenge or complement your commitment to live a lifestyle that is Christ’s style.

Read or highlight the following real-life stories. There are questions to guide a brief discussion with your family or congregation small group as you consider some of the factors that affect the many lifestyle choices you make.

Real-life Stories

#1   Marya’s Many Activities

Marya, age 9, is an active fourth grader involved in soccer and school orchestra. She approaches her father about the possibility of joining Brownies and swimming lessons with some friends, on top of her other activities. As a parent of four, her father is well aware of the financial implications and his financial limitations. But rather than focus on scarcity, he chose to address her proposition through the eyes of  the family’s shared value for time together. So in response, he affirms his daughter’s interests in additional activities, but takes the opportunity to frame this discussion around the opportunity for additional time – not for more running around but rather for quality time together. “Marya, all these things sound like so much fun, including the one’s you’ll already doing...In fact, I know for sure because I’m driving you to and from them all. But, you know what,  I’d like to get out of the car and spend a little time having some fun with you, too. Can you think of some things we could do?”

Questions:

How does Marya’s father’s approach uplift and affirm core values that can be just as important in shaping our lives and relationships as financial responsibility?

How does this approach  help to nurture what could otherwise be a more frustrating or defeating moment for both of them?

What are some of the driving forces that shape the choices you make in your family life?

Share examples of their impact or effect.

#2 Louise’s  3-Ring Dilemma

Louise is a single mother with two children. It’s the time of month when she sits down to pay her monthly bills. Among the bills she notices a ticket order form for Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey’s Circus. This wasn’t the first time she’d been tempted to provide a fun opportunity for her two grade schoolers. As a matter of fact, when the same offer came a year ago, she had put it aside, hoping that “next year” they would be able to go. After all, life is not a rehearsal. Was there anyway she could afford this special outing? She struggled with how to rationalize this investment when other bills were at hand. There was not money to do everything. There never is. After thoughtful consideration, Louise decides to order three of the lowest-priced tickets, not putting off for another year until she could afford better seats. She does not charge them to her credit card, thus not increasing her overall debt. At the same time, she decides she can pay only half of her telephone bill, knowing full well there may be consequences for this action. Louise accepts responsibility for her decision, a decision she felt was “taking hold of the life that really is life” (1 Timothy 6:17-19). And when the circus tickets arrive, she and her children will have a month of delightful anticipation as they eagerly look forward to the big day!

Questions:

Are you comfortable with Louise’s decision? What would you have done differently?

Was going to the circus (and creating a family memory) worth risking getting the phone service disconnected? Why or why not?

Louise felt good about being proactive (deciding on a family outing) rather that reactive (to on-going financial obligations). Can you think of a time when this was the case for you? How did it make you feel?